November 11, 2017

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: I Never Want to See Josh Again (3x05)

Gosh, I almost feel like they should have put a trigger warning at the start of this episode. I'm not somebody who's ever had issues in this particular area, and I still found this very, very upsetting to watch. Wow.

Cons:

Like, no, I'm serious, this was some dark stuff. Think back to the pilot of this show. Would you ever have thought this was where we would be, early in its third season? I commend the show for tackling this subject matter, but I also don't know how to reconcile the tonal shift. Maybe I'm just in shock? I don't know.

One of the plots, with Cornelia the new lawyer, featured a lot of Jim, one of the random people who works at the firm in West Covina. I don't have anything against this dude, but I just thought it was weird that he was elevated to such a significant character for this one random episode. I couldn't even remember this guy's name until now. Felt a little unbalanced to me. I've also got to say, that given what was going on with Rebecca in this episode, the other plot lines could only feel second best in comparison. I don't know what the answer is to this one.

While the songs this week were really fun as always, for the first time in this entire show I felt like they were squeezed in there because they had to be to fill a quota. Very little about the episode would have felt different if you'd taken out the two musical numbers. Usually, I feel like the songs add not only to the mood and atmosphere, but propel the story or tell us something new about a character or a situation. But this time, I felt like we were just putting in the time so we could get back to the good stuff.

Pros:

But let's spend a moment on those subplots anyway - Paula spends time with her family, mourning over the loss of Rebecca's friendship. Her husband and two sons work to cheer her up, playing a girly princess board game they all normally hate, and going with her on a vacation to a resort when she decides to play hookie. This was actually quite lovely to see, as it shows us Paula's continued dedication to spending more time with the family, and also shows that her family cares enough to put in the time. Paula's sons have always been punchlines on this show, so it was actually kind of adorable to see them step up and be there for their mother.

Nathaniel, Darryl, Maya, and Jim all project their feelings about Rebecca onto a new lawyer, Cornelia, who really just wants to do her job. Maya wants her to be her new feminist icon, Jim wants to emulate the "will-they-won't-they" vibe that he believed he had with Rebecca, Darryl wants Cornelia to fill in for Rebecca and discuss his relationship problems with him, and Nathaniel tries to convince himself that Cornelia's calm and professional demeanor is exactly what he wants, and that he's glad Rebecca is out of the picture.

I found some of this stuff a little repetitive, but Cornelia was excellent. I kept waiting for the shoe to drop and to find out she's just as weird as the rest of these people, but it never happened. She tells these infuriating new co-workers that she's going back to her old office and filing HR complaints, and then she's just out. I kind of loved this. Also, my heart aches for Darryl and WhiJo. I hope we can get some focus on them in the coming weeks, despite the fact that we may have bigger fish to fry right now.

Let's talk about Nathaniel. If you can take one thing from his behavior tonight, it's that somewhere along the way, this poor sucker fell in love with Rebecca Bunch. He was in a really rough place this week, as he struggled to accept the fact that Rebecca is not coming back from New York. The conversation between Nathaniel and Paula at the end was really sweet, and in a sick sort of way I'm excited to find out how they both handle the fall-out from what ends up happening at the end of this episode.

So, let's get to it - Rebecca goes home to her mom, her mom sees that she's suicidal, feeds her anxiety meds without her consent, Rebecca finds out, leaves, then attempts suicide by taking all of the pills while on a plane. I can't say enough about Rachel Bloom's performance this week. She's playing numb, and every moment of it makes you just ache for her. Her tentative hopefulness when her mother starts being kind to her, the betrayal she feels when she learns about the pills, the scene on the airplane at the end... just ouch, ouch, ouch.

It is an enormous and terrible betrayal to drug somebody without their consent, obviously. But the way this is framed within the larger narrative is just so brilliant - we know Rebecca and her mom have this awful relationship. We know Rebecca's mother is controlling. But we also know that she loves her daughter entirely. When she sees what Rebecca has been looking at online, her heart really is broken. Rebecca is precious to her. She isn't faking it when she starts being nice to her. There's no ulterior motive at work, necessarily. She just wants her daughter to be alive and okay, and it kind of hurts my heart.

So, the suicide attempt at the end. Let's talk about why this show is so special - it doesn't end with Rebecca taking the pills. It ends with her telling the flight attendant that she needs help. Last week, Heather said that you can't help somebody who doesn't want to be helped, and now, finally, at rock bottom, Rebecca asks for that help. It made me cry. Rachel Bloom's acting in this final scene - the buildup, the way she takes each pill one at a time, like she's making the choice over and over and over again... the way her eyes slide open and closed, her vision going blurry... I can't get over how emotionally affecting and powerful this scene was. True artistry. And this is it - this is the consequence of everything we've seen up to this point. It doesn't feel like a cheap dramatic shot, it doesn't feel like it came out of left field, but it does feel raw, and painful, and nearly impossible to watch.

When I started this show, I had no idea what I was getting myself into, but I cannot regret the ride. Let's see how things shake out in the wake of all of this...

8/10

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