Modern Family: The Wedding Part 2 (5x24)

Very cute. Much better than the first half, I thought. A lot of good jokes, and some real emotional poignancy as well. Let's dive in.

The wedding is rushing forward, as Pepper convinces the firefighters to give them 30 minutes at the venue. However, just as they're about to get started, Sal (who was going to officiate their wedding) goes into labor. Phil volunteers to be the one to marry them, since he got certified online. However, the firefighters are back to say that the winds have shifted - they all have to evacuate right now!

Pepper finds a new venue, but that one falls through as well. Then they go back to Cam and Mitch's house. This also doesn't work out. Cam and Mitch are ready to call it all off, but then Jay comes in and says "you can't do this." Mitch is upset at first, but it turns out Jay meant that they can't have their wedding all cramped up in the house like this. He offers the country club as a suitable location. 

While all of this is going on, chaos is erupting in every corner. Phil wants to do a magic trick as part of his officiating. In the end, he decides not to, letting the strength of Mitch and Cam's love be the focus. Claire continually insists that she's the "best person," instead of "best man," and gives a speech where she congratulates herself on being the best person. However, she also says how happy she is to know that Mitch is with a guy who will look after him just as much as Claire always has.

Supernatural: Do You Believe in Miracles (9x23)

That was a damn good episode. Damn good. I'm very, very impressed by it. There were a number of different theories as to how this season would end, and this... this was one of them. One that I had considered pretty likely, in a way, but not in this way. I'm both surprised and very excited to see what comes next. I'm feeling less sad and more... exhilarated. I can't wait.

We start off with Cas and Sam restraining Dean, as he goes crazy and tries to kill Gadreel. They lock him up in the bunker and go off to find Gadreel, who vanishes after being attacked by Dean. They find Gadreel and Cas is able to heal him, even though it weakens him considerably to do so. Gadreel reveals that Metatron wants humanity to follow him as their new God.

We then see Metatron doing just that - Metatron is drawing power from the angel tablet, making him ultra powerful. He heals people and converts them to his side, soon growing a decent-sized cult of humans around him. Gadreel says that Dean, with the Mark of Cain and the First Blade, might be their best chance to stop Metatron. First, however, they'll need to destroy the angel tablet in order to make Metatron stoppable.

The Mentalist: Blue Bird (6x22)

I am a puddle of feelings. I am incoherent. My God. It happened. Six years of waiting, and it finally happened. I'm overwhelmed. Let's... just... talk about the plot, shall we?

We open with Jane and Cho on a case. Cho mentions that Lisbon is leaving, and Jane is upset that she hasn't told him yet. Jane quickly solves the case, noting how a whole group of friends were all responsible for the death of another friend after things got intense while playing cards.

We flash forward to the day before Lisbon is supposed to leave for DC. A cold case gets opened up: years ago, a high-profile socialite was murdered, and the FBI got a lot of ridicule for being unable to solve it. Because of this, all transfers (including Lisbon's) are being put on hold while they try and solve the case. Jane tells Lisbon to cheer up - it's their last case together!

Jane seems determined to have some fun with Lisbon. They end up going for a nice walk on the beach and even have plans for a fancy dinner. Jane's plans are slightly thwarted when Cho and Abbott show up to partake in the dinner, but Lisbon still looks gorgeous in a dress that Jane got for her. The entire reason this cold case was opened was because the FBI received a note with a riddle that, once solved, led to the Blue Bird Inn. Lisbon, in talking to a hotel employee, learns that Jane had booked rooms for them a week ago, before this case was reopened.

The Big Bang Theory: The Status Quo Combustion (7x24)

The title is apt. Many things are changing on The Big Bang Theory, and I should say - it's about time.

Leonard and Penny announce their engagement, and while everyone is excited, this news is eclipsed by Raj's announcement that he slept with Emily. Leonard's mom hears the news of Leonard's engagement, and is just as apathetic as always. She says that Sheldon approves of Penny, so she's okay with it. Leonard is annoyed that his mother talks to Sheldon more than to him.

Sheldon, who as we all know isn't good with change, is suddenly bombarded with it. The university won't let him switch his specialty from string theory, even though he doesn't feel he can pursue it anymore. Penny and Leonard think about where they'll live now that they're getting married, and Sheldon is horrified that they don't want to live with him. (Even though, funnily enough, Leonard's potential scenarios all involve them staying in that apartment building, across the hall from one another.)

Amy suggests that Sheldon could live with her, which of course he doesn't take well. Then, just when he can't take any more change, he sees that Stuart's comic book store has had a serious fire, and this is the final straw. He decides to take off. Penny and Leonard track him down to the train station, but Sheldon insists that leaving is something he needs to do, so he can figure out his next move. Leonard and Penny say goodbye to him. Amy is furious at Leonard for letting Sheldon go.

Elementary: The Grand Experiment (2x24)

Oh gosh. Feelings are happening. I apologize for my brevity with the plot summary, I'm in a rush.

Sherlock and Joan work to find the real mole inside MI6, meanwhile keeping Mycroft hidden away from prying eyes. Using the clues left on West's tattooed arms, they decipher secret phone calls between a bookshop owner and the mole. They are able to figure out when and where each of these calls came from. They discover that each place and time corresponds to somewhere Mycroft has been. They then realize that Mycroft's handler, who would have been with him in all those places, is the mole, and is setting Mycroft up to take the fall.

Joan and Sherlock are still working on a way to figure things out, but Mycroft goes to meet with his handler. His handler says that if Joan and Sherlock are successful in tracking him down, then he's going to tip off the French paramilitary, and Joan and Sherlock will be "collateral damage." Mycroft takes extreme measures: he contacts the NSA. He tells them to tip off their own contacts among these Frenchmen, and Mycroft's handler is killed. However, now Mycroft is in considerable danger. The NSA agree to fake his own death. Mycroft will have to disappear completely, probably never to be seen again. He says goodbye to Joan and Sherlock.

Joan declares her intent to move out of the Brownstone, even against Sherlock's protests. As Joan finds a suitable place, we see Sherlock take the hidden cocaine and put it in his pocket. He also accepts a job offer with MI6, even though Joan had insisted that she still wanted to work with him.

Grey's Anatomy: Fear (Of the Unknown) (10x24)

Aww! Goodbye Christina! Honestly, I thought they did a lovely job with saying goodbye to this beloved character. They kept it relatively simple, and sweet, and in-character. There's one super duper annoying aspect of this episode, but I'll get to that in just a sec. Let's start with the plot.

It's the day that Christina is finally supposed to go to Zurich. She keeps putting it off, but today, finally, she plans on leaving. However, an explosion at the mall delays Christina yet again, as everyone rushes to deal with the multiple traumas. Christina had been planning on going to the mall, and nobody can find her at first. However, she turns up unharmed, having not gone to the mall after all.

Leah, although she's been fired, comes back to help, and ends up having meaningful experiences helping the patients, even if she's not cut out to be a surgeon. When things have calmed down, she quietly leaves. Callie and Arizona help a surrogate mother who was in the explosion, and the experience makes them think that maybe they want to have a surrogate carry their baby, as well.

The Vampire Diaries: Home (5x22)

Even though I know that Ian Somerhalder isn't leaving this show, I will admit that the ending of this episode was a real punch to the gut. A lot of this episode was gut-punching really, but I still think ultimately they could have done more to make it feel as epic as a finale should. Honestly, I have mixed feelings.

We start off with Damon and Elena rushing home, where Caroline has brought Stefan's body. They're all distraught, but they still believe that Bonnie has a way to bring people back, so hope is not lost yet. However, when Damon goes to ask Bonnie about it, he learns that she lost her opportunity. Enzo, however, has a new Traveler lined up to help them with the spell... Silas. To help them, they also need a witch, and a ritual sacrifice of a bunch of Travelers.

Caroline convinces Liv to help by snapping Luke's neck, putting him on the Other Side. Damon and the others concoct a plan to get all the Travelers to the bar. Then, they'll blow it up, killing all of them. Bonnie has to hang out and be the Anchor for all of this.

Stefan finds Lexi, and the two of them hang out waiting for this all to go down. Sheriff Forbes draws the Travelers to a bar. Jeremy and Matt let the gas leak, and Damon and Elena drive a car into the bar, killing themselves and all the Travelers in the process.

Modern Family: The Wedding Part 1 (5x23)

This is the first half of Mitch and Cam's wedding episode, to be continued next Wednesday. My thoughts? Let's start with a plot summary.

Mitch and Cam's wedding day has arrived, but things don't go smoothly. Firstly, Cam notices that the dry cleaners gave him the wrong tux. When they go to get the right one, they see that the dry cleaners are closed. Eventually, they send Lily in through a mail chute, but she gets caught on the rotating clothes line. The owner comes by because his alarm went off, and he lets them in. They are able to get Cam's tux.

However, that's just the beginning of their problems. A forest fire puts their venue in harm's way, so they have to move the wedding up to earlier to quickly complete it before the firefighters kick them out. Mitch and Cam must rush to get there, and all of the rest of the family has to find ways to get there in time, as well:

Jay, who is still uncomfortable with his son's gay wedding, is at the country club with Cam's dad. The two of them chicken out of telling the other guys that their sons are getting married. They're in the middle of their day at the club when they get the text that the time of the wedding has moved up.

Supernatural: Stairway to Heaven (9x22)

Dean. What. Dean, sweetie, stop it. Listen to your brother. Listen to your angel boyfriend. Get a goddamn grip on yourself. Let's talk about the plot or something. Dean I'm so angry at you.

In an ice cream parlor, a crazy angel kills himself, acting as something of a suicide bomber and wiping out another angel and several humans all at once. He says that he was doing this "for Castiel."

Sam and Dean show up to help Cas with this situation, and are a bit disturbed to find that Cas' followers are something of a cult, hanging on his every word. Cas promises that he would never order an angel to kill himself. Sam believes him, but Dean has a moment of doubt, remembering what Cas was like the last time he had this much power. While Dean goes to talk to other angels about the suicide bomber, Sam and Cas search for the portal to Heaven.

Sam and Cas find a portal, alright, but it ends up being a trick from Metatron. Meanwhile, Dean questions an angel and finds out that the suicide bomber angel was friends with Tessa, the reaper. Dean finds her and the two of them talk. Cas' other angels think that Dean is just a brute, and don't trust him to interrogate Tessa. They make him leave his angel blade outside when he talks to Tessa. Turns out, Tessa has the same symbols carved into her that the suicidal angel did, and she too is planning on killing herself. Dean pulls out the First Blade (even though he promised Sam he wouldn't bring it along) and Tessa impales herself on it.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Beginning of the End (1x22)

That was one of the best hours of television I have ever seen.

I'm dead serious. That was phenomenal. If someone had told me after the first few episodes of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. that I would be saying that about its Season One finale, I wouldn't have believed it. But here we are. Let's start with a plot summary.

So, we see Quinn trying to sell the super soldiers to some important US military figures, when suddenly Garrett shows up, spewing all sorts of god-complex-like nonsense about power and such. He ends up killing one of the military men.

Meanwhile, Coulson, May, Skye, and Triplett all mount an attack on Cybertek. They use Skye's information gathered by the Trojan Horse thing to disable a lot of Cybertek's defenses and get in to their inner offices. While May fights Ward and Coulson tries to hold off Garrett and Deathlok, Skye manages to find Mike's son, Ace.

Fitz and Simmons are trapped at the bottom of the ocean. They manage to come up with an escape plan, but Fitz insists that Simmons save herself using a burst of oxygen. There's only one, so Fitz will sacrifice himself so she can be saved. He tells her that he cares about her as more than a friend, and after she tearfully embraces him, he blows the glass out of their box. Simmons grabs Fitz and brings him to the surface. Fury swoops in like the bad ass that he is, and saves them both, although Fitz is barely alive.

Castle: For Better or Worse (6x23)

"If the promos are anything to go by, next week's finale will be a fun, lighthearted wedding episode." - A quote from last week's review.

Uh... so I guess I was mislead by the promos? Sort of? This episode did not do what I expected it to, at all. I'll do a plot summary before I discuss how I feel about all of this.

So, it's getting close to Castle and Beckett's wedding day. They go to get their marriage license signed, and discover that Beckett is already married! Years ago she went to a drive-through chapel with a guy named Rogan O'Leary, and it turns out that the marriage is still binding. While Alexis and Martha hold down the fort and keep the wedding plans in full swing, Beckett goes to chase down this Rogan guy to get him to sign divorce papers. When she finds him, he won't sign the papers until she steals his ex-girlfriend's garage door opener. Beckett does this, but before Rogan can sign the papers, he gets kidnapped!

Castle joins Beckett as they try to investigate what happened with Rogan. Eventually, they discover that Rogan had taken pictures off of a stripper's phone, which implicated some important men in compromising situations. Rogan needed the garage door opener to get to his ex's computer, where some of these pictures were. Castle and Beckett find Rogan, but they also discover that one of the pictures with the stripper is of a mob boss who has been in hiding for years - Rogan unwittingly pissed off a very important and dangerous man!

The Mentalist: Black Hearts (6x21)

I continue to be fascinated and delighted by this current decision to stretch a single case over multiple episodes. Now, we finally have some closure on the trafficking case, but we're opening up even more questions about Lisbon's future. Let's dive in.

As far as the case goes, I'll be brief: the team narrows down on the bad guy by tracing the ownership of the truck to his company, but they need to get proof that he's responsible for the trafficking. In order to find him, they must first find the ex-doctor who removed the organs from the kidnapped girls. They track him down, but Cho and Fischer almost get themselves blown up for their trouble. They are able to question the doctor, which leads them to almost tracking down a client of our big bad guy. Unfortunately, the bad guy is one step ahead of them, and his client disappears before they can find him.

So, Jane goes over and has a drink with their prime suspect, drugging him in the process. He and Lisbon then stage an elaborate ruse to get the guy to confess. They dress up as doctors and pretend to gruesomely murder someone, while the bad guy, strapped to a nearby table, watches. Jane then prepares to cut open the bad guy, but he hands over his computer password in desperation, and thus gives them the evidence they need.

Abbott asks Jane and Lisbon if they really tortured the guy for answers, but they both deny it. Even after Jane leaves, Lisbon doesn't tell on him.

Once Upon a Time: Snow Drifts/There's No Place Like Home (3x21/22)

I'll review this as a double episode, since that's how it was meant to be watched. I'll try to reign myself in, but I have a lot to talk about.

So first of all, we have a flashback to when Emma was just a little girl, as she watches someone else get adopted. She longs for a home of her own. Later on, as a teenager, she and Neal hang out together, and Neal tells Emma that the way to know if you've found a home is if you miss it when you're away. Emma has taken this philosophy to heart: her whole life, she just keeps running away, waiting for the time she'll miss what she's left behind.

In Storybrooke, Mary Margaret and David prepare a party at Granny's to announce the name of their new son. Regina and Robin have a romantic time together, and Regina confesses to Robin about Tinker Bell, and the tattoo. Robin says that maybe they just needed the timing to be right. Emma still plans on leaving Storybrooke and heading back to New York. Hook tries to convince her it's a bad idea, but she says that she doesn't feel at home here - when she looks at her family, she sees fairy tale characters, not family members.

The Big Bang Theory: The Gorilla Dissolution (7x23)

Awwww cuteness occurred!

Leonard goes to visit the set of Penny's terrible gorilla movie. When she tries to ask to do a take again, she is fired. Wil Wheaton, in standing up for her, also gets fired. The three of them go out to drink together. Wil's speech about artistic integrity is interrupted by a text telling him he got an audition for Sharknado 2. He leaves. Penny talks about how she needs to start making better choices in her life, starting with this one: she wants to marry Leonard. At first, Leonard is upset, thinking that Penny is only marrying him because it's the practical thing to do. But Penny assures him that she wants to be with him, because he's all she needs to be happy. Leonard pulls a ring out of his wallet and proposes properly. They are finally engaged for real.

When Raj and Sheldon go out to see a movie together, they run into Emily, who is out with another man. Raj and Sheldon talk about Raj's feelings, but of course Sheldon is not much help in situations like this, and he kicks Raj out. Emily comes over, and they talk about their relationship. Emily says that she was basically out with that guy because he kept asking her out and she wanted to get it out of the way. She also mentions that she has some tattoos - one in a very intimate place. Raj and Emily spend the night together.

The Vampire Diaries: Promised Land (5x21)

What. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. Happening. Right. Now. I cannot wait for next week. I seriously need this finale like right the fuck now.

Stefan and Elena have been captured by Markos and the other Travelers, and they are slowly being drained of blood. Maria, Julian's wife, frees them, and they start to make their way back home. Damon, meanwhile, has been collecting the bodies of Travelers, with help from Matt and Jeremy. Tyler, aka Julian, is trapped in the cellar. Damon tries to figure out Markos' plan, but Markos, who shows up when he notices his friends' bodies are missing, refuses to trade them for anything. He says that he doesn't really care if the Travelers get put back into their own bodies or not.

The Travelers are gearing up to enact the spell that will allow them to remain in Mystic Falls, but that will also undo all Witch magic. Daylight rings will stop working, Vampires will be "cured," as in killed, and everything will basically be awful for our main characters.

Elena and Stefan get picked up on the side of the road by Maria, but as she is driving them back home, Luke and Liv show up. Unfortunately, they know of only one way to stop the Travelers now: kill the doppelgangers. They don't manage to succeed, but they do kill Maria in the scuffle.

Elementary: Art in the Blood (2x23)

After such a fantastic episode last week, I was hoping for another great installment this time around. Unfortunately... well, let's take a look and then we can talk about it.

So, we start off with Sherlock going to Bell and Gregson, still in full panic mode about Joan. Then... he gets a phone call from her! Joan tells him that she's at home, and to come straight there. He does, to confront his brother. Mycroft explains that he's British Intelligence. Sherlock is shocked that his brother could have hid this from him all these years, and is furious that his deceit put Joan in such a dangerous situation.

Sherlock then goes to meet Mycroft's fellow MI6 agents, and they ask for Sherlock's help with a case, in exchange for their help in saving Joan's life. The case is as follows: a former operative of MI6 named West, who had gone somewhat off the grid due to his paranoid delusions, was insisting he had more information to give British Intelligence. West then turned up dead. MI6 wants Sherlock to figure out if there's anything more going on. It turns out there is: when they go to examine West's body in the morgue, they discover his arms have been removed.

Grey's Anatomy: Everything I Try to Do, Nothing Seems to Turn Out Right (10x23)

I'm annoyed at some things, delighted by others, and sort of in the middle with still others. A mixed bag, I think. One week away from the finale, it seems like they're setting up most of our beloved characters to start these new chapters in their lives, and yet others are backsliding into familiar patterns. It's hard to piece together.

So, first of all, Owen sets Christina the task of interviewing for new heart surgeons. Meredith expects it's a ploy to get Christina to stay. If she has to interview a bunch of people who aren't right for the job, then she'll want to stay. Christina isn't too impressed with the candidates, but most of them, she says, would be fine. Owen doesn't ask her to stay, knowing it would be useless to offer her the job when she already has such an amazing opportunity waiting for her. He does ask her: "don't leave me until you're leaving me," and the two of them share a passionate embrace.

Derek is away in DC for work, and Meredith spends time with Amy. Amy seems to be struggling with something, and eventually confides in Meredith that she wants to call off her engagement and come to Seattle. Meredith is overjoyed with the thought of Amy coming to the hospital. She can take on some of Derek's work and help out with the kids, solving their conundrum. However, Derek throws a wrench in that plan: he comes home from DC with big news. Apparently, he met the President, and was offered a job in DC. He really wants to take it, and says Meredith would have an attending position waiting for her in DC, too. Now that everyone else is moving on, maybe it's time for them, too.

Modern Family: Message Received (5x22)

Ha. Some cute moments. And some surprisingly serious ones! This might be the most serious plot thread I've ever seen start on Modern Family. I'm immensely proud of the show for going down this path. I'll be excited to see where it leads.

Jay makes a sandwich for Manny but Manny doesn't want it because it has pickles. This prompts Jay to tell Manny he's being too sensitive, and he says that Manny can't leave the table until he tries the pickle. Gloria calls Jay out by forcing him to eat a blood sausage, something he hasn't ever been willing to try. Gloria's white whale? Scratching Stella's belly. All three of them are forced to confront their fear to prove themselves not a hypocrite. Eventually, they do. Later, we see Gloria and Manny sneaking around to rub Stella's belly and eat pickles, their pride too strong to admit they liked it.

Haley, Alex, and Luke find a box of old mementos of their parents, including an answering machine. On it, we hear Claire tell Phil that she's pregnant with Haley. This was before they were married. The kids decide to pull a prank on their parents. They concoct a fake message and leave it for Phil, making Phil think that Claire is pregnant again. He rushes home all excited, only to discover the truth. They then decide to trick their kids by staging a big argument. It backfires when Phil starts to get actually upset about Claire saying she should have married her old boyfriend. They then have a talk where Claire says she's so happy she married Phil and they got to have this life together.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Ragtag (1x21)

Update: Still good. Yup. The show is still good. I think this episode was probably the most underwhelming of the ones since the HYDRA twist, but even still, it's miles ahead of the episodes before S.H.I.E.L.D. fell. I think the reason I liked it a little less is that it focused on Ward, and even though he's a thousand times more interesting as a villain, he's still probably my least favorite main character to watch. Still, I'm impressed. Let's talk about what happens.

We learn about Ward's past, in a series of flashbacks. Garrett found him in juvenile detention and recruited him to the cause. He left Ward and Buddy, a dog, in the woods for several months, apparently teaching him the need to survive on his own. Ward adapts and survives. When Garrett shows up again, he tells Ward about HYDRA. He then makes Ward kill Buddy to prove that he he can overcome his weaknesses.

In the present day, Coulson and the team discover that Cybertek seems to be the root of all their problems. They are responsible for Project Centipede, HYDRA, the Clairvoyant, Ian Quinn, Deathlok, etc. Skye has included a Trojan Horse on the files she gave to Ward, but in order to access it, she needs to plug something into one of Cybertek's computers.

Supernatural: King of the Damned (9x21)

DEAN WINCHESTER YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE YOUNG MAN. YOU LISTEN TO YOUR BROTHER, DO YOU HEAR ME?! Argggh! This is so frustrating! What is even going on right now?!

So. Cas calls Sam and Dean over to help him with something. When they arrive, they see that Cas has a whole operation set up, with angels doing his orders. Cas explains that he wants to stop all the angels from killing one another, and that he doesn't really want to lead, but has no choice, all the other viable leaders having been killed off. Cas called in the brothers because they have one of Metatron's helpers, and they need to get information out of him. Dean seems all too eager to torture the angel for info.

Before he can start in on the torture, however, Sam deflects the situation by verbally taunting the angel, laughing at him and remarking that he probably doesn't even know anything about Metatron's plans. The angels, eager to prove that he's legit, starts spilling secrets. Apparently there's a portal to Heaven that can be moved at Metatron's will. He's also gathering a group of elite angels for some sort of secret mission, but their captive doesn't know much more.

Castle: Veritas (6x22)

Hmmm... Interesting. Good interesting, for the most part, but still sort of weird, in certain ways. Let's dive in.

Beckett is looking in to finding a connection between Senator Bracken and Vulcan Simmons, so she can prove that the Senator is funding his presidential campaign with drug money. One of the people Beckett was following winds up dead, which makes everything more confusing. Castle makes Beckett promise not to take unnecessary risks, but Beckett can't leave it alone: she goes to find a car with physical evidence that Vulcan murdered the dead guy. She finds the car, but she also finds Vulcan.

They talk, and then Beckett leaves. The next day, Vulcan is found dead. Ballistics show that the bullets came from one of Beckett's guns. She's being framed! She and Castle go on the run from the police. Beckett is captured by Bracken and his men, and they try to kill her, framing it like suicide. However, Beckett is able to use quick thinking and trickery to fight her way out. Castle gets her out of there and they go on the run.

Meanwhile, they find out that "Mr. Smith," presumed dead, has actually been in hiding. He tells Castle and Beckett that there's a tape somewhere where Bracken admits to all sorts of crimes, including the murder of Beckett's mother.

Once Upon a Time: Kansas (3x20)

I'm majorly angry about one key element of this episode, and it's hard to get past it and look at the rest of it calmly, but I'll try. Let's start with a plot summary.

In the past of Oz, we see Zelena still jealously wishing for a way to change her past and get what her sister has always had. Glinda finds Zelena and invites her to join the council of witches - each represents a powerful force and a direction. Glinda, from the South, represents Love. The other two represent East and North, as well as Courage and Wisdom. They need to fill the empty seat of the West, which is the power of Innocence. A prophecy speaks of a powerful witch arriving in Oz in a cyclone, and thus Glinda believes the prophecy speaks of Zelena. Zelena decides to join them, and she is happy with her new sisters.

That is, until Dorothy shows up in a cyclone. Zelena reads the prophecy and learns that the new witch is supposed to defeat a great evil. She figures out that the prophecy is about Dorothy, and that she, Zelena, is the evil one. Glinda says that she doesn't have to let that be her destiny, but Zelena sees herself as evil, and doesn't know how to change that.

The Mentalist: Il Tavolo Bianco (6x20)

My feeeeelllllliiiiinnnnggggsssss. Whyyyyy.

Cho, Wylie, and Abbott continue on with the human trafficking case we started last time. Several of the women are still missing. Eventually, Cho discovers the horrible truth: some of these women are being tagged as involuntary organ donors. They find several bodies, including the missing sister of one of the rescued girls. This girl is missing her heart.

Meanwhile, a new case arises. Jane is indicted for the murder of Red John, and Lisbon and Fischer are forced to go in and answer questions. After they are put through this ordeal, Jane and Abbott tell them that it's all a setup. They want Jane to be put in front of the jury so he can figure out which one of them was bribed to let a gangster off the hook for murder. Jane quickly discovers that it's the prosecuting attorney who was bribed. In order to prove it, Jane must allow himself to get on the radar of the gangster, so that the guy will put a hit out on him, and they can prove his guilt for the earlier murder. Jane seduces the gangster's girl, and indeed does get a hit put out on him. They are able to get the bad guy in the end, and also arrest the corrupt attorney.
 

The Vampire Diaries: What Lies Beneath (5x20)

I... don't... know... but I'm pretty sure this episode is awesome. It seems like a callback to earlier days of the show, which is fantastic for all sorts of reasons. I mean, Season One of The Vampire Diaries had its extremely silly moments, I won't deny that, but there was something so fresh and horrific and new about it all the same. This episode had a bit of that feel. Let's talk about the plot.

Tyler awakens among the Travelers. He pretends to still be a Traveler long enough to transform into a werewolf and escape. He rushes to the Salvatore house and tells everyone the Traveler's plan to drain Stefan and Elena's blood. Damon, Stefan, Elena, and Caroline go out to Caroline's dad's cabin, bringing Luke with them to perform a cloaking spell. That way, the Travelers won't be able to find them.

While at the cabin, Caroline notices that Stefan and Elena are acting weird and thinks maybe they've gotten back together. Of course, the actual secret is about Enzo being dead. Enzo, as a ghost, discovers that he can interact with the mortal world, due to the barriers between the Other Side getting all messed up. Enzo freaks everyone out and takes Luke out of the equation, thus allowing the Travelers to track them. Damon is angry that Enzo is dead, but he doesn't suddenly lose it. He and Stefan go to find and rescue Luke, and Enzo tries to burn them by setting a shed on fire. Damon promises to help find a way to bring Enzo back, and says that if the Other Side truly falls, Enzo will stop existing all together. Enzo reluctantly lets Damon, Stefan, and Luke go without killing them.

Grey's Anatomy: We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (10x22)

I'm not sure what to think. There are a lot of things I could say about Isaiah Washington, and the circumstances under which he left the show years ago... but I don't want to close the door on the possibility that he has changed for the better. I don't know him. I don't know his story. Maybe he sought out T.R. Knight and personally apologized. Maybe he's turned himself around. And maybe, for the sake of an objective review of this show, and not its actors, it doesn't matter. It's hard for me not to think about it, though, when I see Washington reappear years after being fired for homophobic slurs. Let's set that aside for the rest of the review, and talk about what happened onscreen.

Richard Webber calls a board meeting (but doesn't include Jackson) and tries to encourage Christina to appeal the Harper Avery award, since Christina should have won. Owen convinces Christina to go to Switzerland to speak at a hospital about her research. When she gets there, she finds out who invited her in the first place: Preston Burke. Burke shows her his amazing hospital, and also tells her about his wife and kids. Burke says he's stepping away from the hospital to dedicate himself to his family, and he wants Christina to have his hospital. Christina can't pass up such a good offer, and she accepts.

The Big Bang Theory: The Proton Transmogrification (7x22)

A bit of a mixed bag, honestly. I was expecting a lot more hilarious Star Wars material than I got. Let's go quickly.

The guys prepare to marathon all six Star Wars movies on May the 4th. Leonard tells Sheldon that Arthur Jeffries (Professor Proton) has died. His funeral is on May 4th, too.

Sheldon sleeps through the movie marathon, while Raj and Howard watch out in the living room. Jeffries comes to Sheldon in his dreams, fulfilling the role of Obi-Wan to Sheldon's Luke Skywalker, and giving him advice about life. The main piece of advice is to cherish the people in your life before they're gone.

Leonard and Penny go to the funeral and talk about regrets they have in their lives. Leonard says he regrets not saying yes to Penny's marriage proposal. This causes an argument about how many times they've each proposed to each other, and how they have to even the score by being rejected by each other the same number of times. When Leonard comes home, Sheldon gives him a hug, taking Jeffries' advice to cherish his friends.

Elementary: Paint It Black (2x22)

Ahhh! What the hell was that?! This was wonderful! Lucy Liu's directorial debut for television, and Mycroft, and kidnapping, and bad-assery, and just general awesomeness. I was a big fan of this episode, and especially of what it means for the future of the show. Let's take a look at the plot.

Joan has been kidnapped, and Mycroft convinces the kidnappers (members of the French paramilitary) to agree to a trade. If Mycroft, with Sherlock's assistance, can procure the whereabouts of Pierce Norman and a list of valuable Swiss bank clients, Joan will be set free.

Mycroft and Sherlock try to track down Pierce Norman, but instead they find his corpse. Turns out, Pierce was framed for the crimes of another. Sherlock finds the man actually responsible, and threatens to torture him if he doesn't hand over the list of names that will free Joan.

We also find out during all of this that Mycroft is reporting to the same strange boss that we saw him talk to once before on the phone. When Sherlock has the information he wants, he wants to turn it over to the NSA so that they can go in and insure Joan's safety. Mycroft can't have that. He tasers his own brother and goes to make the trade in person. Sherlock awakens and begs the NSA to help him save Joan, now that he's been betrayed by Mycroft.

Modern Family: Sleeper (5x21)

I'm going to say right off the bat that I think this episode lacked focus. There were a lot of threads dangling, and most of them didn't ever feel completed. Even though we had a centralized theme of getting a family photo, the family didn't come together in any meaningful way, and there weren't any good jokes generated by them all being in one place. Let's go through what happens.

Phil was supposed to stay at home and wait for the repairman, but he ends up missing him when he goes out to get a record. The record is the one that was playing when he lost his virginity, and he's afraid that Claire will be mad that he "cheated on her" with the memory of his first sexual experience. Alex is doing a project in school on narcolepsy, and she learns that her father may have it, when the extreme stress of lying to Claire causes him to fall asleep.

Mitch is worried that his own family doesn't know him and doesn't pay any attention to him. Throughout the episode, he is constantly ignored and pushed aside for other concerns. In the end, Jay tells him that maybe the rest of the family leaves him alone because he's so dependable and can take care of his own stuff.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Nothing Personal (1x20)

Every time I start a review for this show, lately, I feel the need to say this upfront: it's actually good now! Seriously. I keep waiting to learn that it's a fluke... that we're going to fall back into boring patterns, but no. Everything that has happened since the HYDRA twist has been ten times better than what came before. This episode is no exception to that. Let's see what happened:

May meets up with Maria Hill and tells her where Coulson and the others are. Hill reveals that she works with Tony Stark now, and that they're trying to privatize the nation's security with Stark Industries. At Providence, Simmons finds Koenig's body, and Fitz finds a message left from Skye telling them that Ward is HYDRA. Simmons examines the body and concludes that Ward was the one who killed him. Fitz has a meltdown at the thought of Ward betraying them. Coulson says they need to focus: Skye is with Ward now, and they probably don't have long before Ward figures out that Skye knows the truth. At this point, Maria Hill leads US troops to Providence, Talbot among them. When Coulson explains to Hill what's going on with Ward and HYDRA, she helps Coulson and the rest of the team escape the base.

Meanwhile, on the Bus, Skye is continuing to play the good girlfriend, and Ward doesn't seem to suspect anything. Skye leads them to the cafe where she first met Mike Peterson, saying that this is the place to open the encrypted files. While in the cafe, Skye stalls for time and tips off the cops about Ward's identity. Ward is able to evade capture, and although Skye tries to drive away, she too is caught: by Mike Peterson. Peterson and Ward hold Skye captive. Ward tells Skye that his feelings for her are real, even if everything else is a lie. She is disgusted, and refuses to open the files. At this point Peterson, working on orders from Garrett, threatens to kill Ward unless Skye does what needs doing. She caves, unwilling to let Ward die, no matter what he's done.

Supernatural: Bloodlines (9x20)

I didn't get a chance to watch this episode right away, so I had plenty of time to watch everything unfold on tumblr before I actually saw it for myself. It seems like most people didn't like it... or thought it was really weak in comparison to the parent show. Myself? Well, if you view this as an episode of Supernatural, it's infuriating because we really want to focus on the bigger plot concerns like Metatron, Abaddon, Crowley, Cas, et al, and I get that. But if you view it as the pilot for a new show? Not awful, in my opinion. Not spectacular... definitely needs a lot of work... but not awful.

So. We're in Chicago. And we meet our main character, a guy named Ennis. Just before he was about to propose to his girlfriend, some monsters get into a fight and she is killed on accident. Ennis, furious, wants to track down the monsters responsible. The Winchesters, on the hunt for whatever's causing trouble in the area, run into Ennis. We learn that Ennis has a sister, his mother is out of the picture, and his father, a former cop, was killed. Sam and Dean warn him not to get himself tied up in all of this, but Ennis refuses to stay put. He wants revenge.

We discover that Chicago is run by five supernatural families. We don't get to know much about the djin, vampires, etc. but we do learn about two key families.

Castle: Law and Boarder (6x21)

Is it just me, or was the case of the week particularly confusing in this episode? It seemed to go all over the place! My summary, by contrast, is going to be rather brief.

A competitive skateboarder turns up dead, and the team has to figure out why. At first they think it might be his competition, then they think it's his mom's ex-boyfriend who was hardcore into drugs and went to jail because of the murder victim. Then, it seems to be tied to a law firm of some sort. They track down several viable suspects, but none of them seem to be the murderer. They eventually discover that the victim's friend was killed several years ago, and it was caught on tape. The murderer had money to pay off the other witnesses, but he had to wait to turn twenty-one, for his trust fund to mature. They catch the guy who committed these two murders, the second one to cover up the first.

In subplot news, Beckett beats Castle at a game of Scrabble and Castle gets pretty upset about it. He keeps trying to set up rematches with her, but she's not interested. In the end they play a game of strip poker, which both find to be more fun.

Ryan and Esposito find out that Lanie is Beckett's maid of honor, and the two of them both start campaigning for the job of best man. In the end, they announce to Castle that they'd be okay being co-best men. Castle awkwardly tells them that he asked Alexis to be his best man, and asks if they'll be his groomsmen.

The Mentalist: Brown Eyed Girls (6x19)

Oh gosh... I feel bad about saying this, but I sort of hope that this season is the last of The Mentalist. It's not that I don't love it. Actually, I think the stuff post-Red John has been refreshing and interesting, for the most part. But I'd love to see something decisive happen about Jane and Lisbon in the finale of this season, and from that point on I'm not sure if there are more stories to tell. Let's look at the plot of this one. It was a surprisingly sad episode.

Jane, while just minding his own business, notices a man with suspicious grocery items and deduces that he has kidnapped a girl. He calls Lisbon away from her date with Pike, and they arrive to find a girl who has been shot. She dies before help can arrive. The man whose house it was ends up being a bit insane. He apparently found the shot girl on the side of the road and wanted to patch her up, just like he does with other "garbage" he finds dumped on the highway. Jane uses some hypnotic tricks to get him to remember exactly where he found the girl. From there, they are able to discover that this girl was part of a human trafficking scheme.

Jane and the others pull a trick on the trucker radio frequency, pretending to all be truckers who have been pulled over by the cops on one particular stretch of road. This way, all of the truckers in the area will be scared and will pull in to a rest stop. This plan works, and they are able to find the woman driving a truck full of girls. Jane and Abbott pretend to be interested in making a trade with the brothers in Mexico who were looking to pick up this cargo. They trap them into coming onto US soil and revealing their involvement in the trafficking.

Once Upon a Time: A Curious Thing (3x19)

Oh gosh. Let's take a look.

In the Enchanted Forest during the year nobody remembers, Belle shows up to tell the Charmings, Regina, Aurora and Phillip about what happened with Neal and Rumple. Aurora says that Zelena wants Snow's baby. She and Phillip were forced to tell Zelena when everyone arrived back in their own world, because Zelena threatened to hurt them. Zelena then turns up to capitalize on that promise. She easily immobilizes the Charmings and Regina, and she turns Aurora and Phillip into flying monkeys.

Eight months later, as Snow is getting close to having her baby, they all try to figure out how to defeat Zelena. They have the idea that maybe Rumple can help them. He's being held captive in his own castle, and Robin Hood, who has broken in there before, warns them that it's full of traps. He goes along to help, much to Regina's displeasure. They find Rumple, apparently totally crazy, in a cage. When Belle takes his hand, Rumple seems to come back to himself a little bit, and he tells Belle that Glinda the Good Witch might be their only chance of defeating Zelena.

Grey's Anatomy: Change of Heart (10x21)

Can I just say that I'm really, really, worried about the promo I just saw for next week's episode? I'm just very concerned. But I shouldn't focus on that right now... I can wait until next Thursday to talk about that one. Let's focus on this week.

Meredith is livid about Christina's loss, but Christina doesn't seem angry. She scares Owen and Meredith by going AWOL after the ceremony and not making the flight home with them. She shows up back at the hospital seemingly okay, but things start going really wrong with the three kids with the heart defects. At one point, Christina is forced to choose which of the girls to give a new heart to. Unfortunately, the other girl dies. At one point, Christina is working on one of the girls while the other one is in the OR with Leah and Shane. Leah has to stitch something up, and although she's nervous, she manages to succeed. In the end, though, it doesn't matter, since the girl still dies. Christina wonders what the point of everything is - even if she does everything she's supposed to, she's not recognized for it, and she can't save everyone's lives.

Richard surprises Catherine Avery with a trip to see her, planning to propose. While he's there, he learns that Christina did get the votes to win the award, but because the Harper Avery foundation owns part of the hospital, no doctor who works there will ever be able to win it. Owen breaks this news to Christina.

The Vampire Diaries: Man on Fire (5x19)

Well okay, then. I asked for some Stefan/Damon broments, and I got them. Unfortunately even that isn't enough for me to give the show a free pass... luckily, the rest of this episode held up pretty well!

Enzo, on the hunt for his missing Maggie (the girl he fell in love with while held captive by Augustine) discovers that Maggie was killed in the '60s. Because of the way she was murdered, Enzo deduces that Stefan is the party responsible, from his ripper days. Enzo kidnaps Luke to force Liv to help him, and the two of them capture Stefan and Elena, who had been studying together in a coffee shop.

Meanwhile, Matt and Jeremy make the unfortunate discovery that the Traveler knife is missing. Apparently too idiotic to figure out what this means, the two of them scratch their heads, clueless, until Damon comes along and points out that this probably means that Tyler has been possessed by the Travelers. Sure enough, this seems to be the case.

Damon gets a call from Enzo, asking him about Stefan's whereabouts in the '60s. Damon figures out that Enzo has his brother and Elena held captive, and he tries to talk him down, insisting that Stefan wasn't even a Ripper in the '60s. He rushes down to the coffee house to stop Enzo from killing Stefan. He's too late to prevent a little torture, though.