Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Nathaniel Needs My Help! (3x08)

I am SUCH a broken record but my goodness is this show excellent. Where do I even start?

Cons:

I've realized that I only have one consistent complaint throughout the history of this entire show: not enough focus on the secondary characters. This season, we've seen so very little of Valencia, and it's bumming me out. It looks like next week will give us some WhiJo, but he was absent this week as well. So was Heather. I wish there was a way to balance out some more time with these characters, because every single one of them deserves tons of time and attention.

Okay, so... Josh comes to Rebecca's house and thanks her for changing him. Before they met, he says, he had set the bar so low for himself. Rebecca helped him realize that he could have more. Here's the thing about this conversation: I could see it happening, maybe, like ten years down the road. Rebecca and Josh bump in to each other, both of them have decided to forgive each other for their pain and suffering... but let's back up and think about this for a moment. Sure, Josh is not a saint, and there are many things that he did that were less than ideal. But Rebecca? By any sane measure she was the bad guy in their relationship. She stalked him, lied to him, manipulated him, cheated on him, threatened him... I'm not saying that Rebecca should be thrown in prison or anything. Watching her journey towards improving her mental health is the most fascinating thing on this show. But for Josh to thank her? For Rebecca to think that Josh was coming to apologize? Even after all of her therapy, does Rebecca not think she owes Josh an apology as well? Yikes!

Pros:

Let's start with Josh Chan - he's still living at home, and the task of packing up the closet for his impending move makes him nostalgic. His mother Lourdes sings a song called "Get Your Ass Out of My House" on his old karaoke machine, and it was fantastic. I've already discussed that I find the idea of Josh thanking Rebecca a bit distasteful, but that doesn't mean that everything going on in his story is bad. On the contrary - we're seeing a continuation of the setup from the last episode. As much as Rebecca's unhealthy obsession hurt her, it also influenced Josh quite a bit. He is realizing that so much of his life was centered around Rebecca for a while. For the first time in his blissfully uncomplicated life, he doesn't know what he wants or how to even begin going after his goals. He's got a lot of problems of his own to sort through, and he really does need to unpack some complicated feelings after getting out of two relationships in a row with very manipulative, demanding women. I'm excited to explore more with his character. Lourdes is also just quite simply the best, so it was nice to see her get a song all to herself.

Then we've got Darryl and Paula's plot thread. I bet that we see Darryl grapple with his heartbreak a bit more in later episodes, but for now we are focused on his desire to have another kid. This is something he really, really wants. I'm glad that we see him take concrete steps to have a child, because it proves that the breakup with White Josh was not contrived - this really is something that's important to him. Of course, Paula starts meddling again, and things turn out horribly - she finds the donor that she and Darryl both like, but who has removed her eggs from consideration. She manipulates her into saying yes, but then gets blackmailed... in the end, Paula is relieved that the conception doesn't take. However, Darryl is devastated. It's very expensive to purchase eggs for this kind of surrogacy, and he might have to wait another year before he can afford to try again. However, he decides to sell all of his artifacts to cover the cost of another try - he doesn't want to wait. Although Paula has learned another good lesson about meddling, Darryl still wants her to be a part of his child's life - "Aunt Paula."

Where to even start? It was nice to have a big, meaty plot thread featuring Darryl and Paula, as I think their friendship is a really sweet and under-appreciated part of the show. Paula still has a serious problem with meddling, but this time it really was from a place of pure altruism. She's not living vicariously through Darryl because she's unhappy, like she was for Rebecca. And when things almost go very poorly. she realizes her mistake right away and vows to learn from it. I like the fact that things didn't go horribly wrong - in the end, Paula and Darryl don't have to deal with a blackmailing liar. They get to try again and do this the right way.

Darryl's song, "My Sperm is Healthy," was simply fascinating in what it taught me about censorship on TV. Go listen to the explicit version, and you'll see what I mean - it's hilarious which words and concepts are deemed to be crossing the line, and which ones are okay. In any case, both versions of the song were a lot of fun. What a ridiculous show this is. I love it so much.

Finally, we've got Rebecca and Nathaniel. I find it so interesting that Rebecca's story is the one without any songs this week. In some ways it helps to keep it grounded, and it feels like the absence of music is in some way a measure of how seriously Rebecca is taking her recovery. We see multiple scenes of her in therapy, both one-on-one and in group, and we also see as she falls back in to unhealthy patterns. Her and Nathaniel are in the giddy, happy stages of a new relationship, and Rebecca immediately starts being obsessive. She finds out that Nathaniel wishes he had a better relationship with his father, so she enlists George to help her, ends up following Nathaniel Sr. around, and stumbles upon what she believes to be evidence of a secret affair and love child. She then introduces Nathaniel to his "sister," only to learn the totally rational and not at all scandalous truth of the situation.

Much like with Paula and Darryl's plot thread, I like the fact that nothing too horrible happens here. Rebecca acts really inappropriately, but in the end very little real harm is done. There is no soap-opera-esque twist about Nathaniel's family, and Rebecca apologizes and promises never to do it again. Nathaniel decides to forgive her. Of course, we see Rebecca finally recognize that her behavior towards Nathaniel is unhealthy. She realizes what she has to do, and as the episode ends she is showing up at his door to break up with him.

All of the scenes with Rebecca in therapy were just so golden and perfect. Her therapist tells her that she is of course allowed to have a healthy, good relationship with BPD, but he cautions her against falling back in to old patterns. Rebecca has a lot of rationalizations as to why what she's doing is different this time, but in the end she finally recognizes it. The scene where she talks about glitter exploding inside of her, and then suddenly says "ohhhh...." as she puts together the truth, is probably the best scene of the episode. I'm so glad that Rebecca is recognizing these unhealthy behaviors in herself. It's the right thing to do, to give herself some time away from forming a romantic relationship. As her therapist said, this doesn't mean she can't have a successful and happy relationship in the future... but as sad as it is, she needs to take some time for herself right now.

Everything about this show is so brilliant and good. I love the fact that Nathaniel's name has replaced Josh in the titles of episodes. We got a brief interlude where "Jeff" was the man's name... I can only assume that some day we're all going to get very emotional over the fact that an episode title is completely devoid of a man's name at all. Maybe Rebecca's own name will start appearing? What a clever naming convention. It carries so much weight!

I'm extremely excited to see the Nathaniel and WhiJo bromance form next week, as these two poor dudes get over their heartbreak in what looks to be hilarious fashion. Until then, I'll just be singing "My Sperm is Healthy" to myself, and hoping nobody hears!

9/10