Modern Family: Knock 'Em Down (6x20)

Not a standout winner of an episode, but not bad either. Let's go over what happened.

Cam asks Jay to fill in for somebody on his bowling team. Jay agrees, but Cam then tells him that it's an all-gay bowling league, so Jay will have to pretend to be gay. Jay reluctantly agrees. Cam's rival, the head of another team, suspects that Jay is straight, so Cam tells the guy (Martin) that the reason Jay is acting so weird is that he has a crush on Martin. Martin gets all flustered and decides he likes Jay too. The two of them flirt a bit, but when Martin asks Jay out, Jay turns him down kindly. This rejection causes Martin to become very flustered, and he loses the game. Jay and Cam's team wins! Jay then tells Martin the truth, because he doesn't think it's fair to let him go home feeling rejected. When Martin discovers Jay is straight, Cam loses his victory and the team is disqualified.

This plot thread could have gone wrong about a million different ways. I was bracing myself to cringe at every joke, at every attempt that Jay made to "act gay." But you know what? They actually pulled it off quite well! Cam and Jay have an interesting father-and-son-in-law dynamic, and I always like how the more flamboyant of the Cam and Mitchell pairing is also the more athletic, and how Jay sometimes has an easier time getting along with Cam than with his own son. And Jay didn't pretend to be gay by talking with a lisp or walking around with a limp wrist or anything. He just acted like himself. The scenes with Martin were actually rather sweet. Jay was charming, and Martin fell for him, and Jay was not at all grossed out that a man had a crush on him. He was respectful and kind to him when he turned him down. I hate that I have to be pleasantly surprised that this plot thread wasn't horrifically offensive, but there you have it. I also liked the exploration of Jay's anxiety about his aging. He's obsessive about a picture on his Costco ID, where he thinks he looks worn out, and nothing like his real self. Cam notes that this behavior, wherein Jay is superficial and worried about his looks, is a good start in Jay's quest to play gay.

Meanwhile, Gloria and Mitchell are going to go out dancing with Haley while their husbands are out bowling. They talk a big game, saying that they're going to be able to stay out partying all night. They are dismayed to learn that the clubs don't even open until 9, and that the band they're going to see doesn't go on until midnight. However, they try to push through. At one point they fall asleep, but they do manage to go out for a bit. The minute they try to enter the busy club, they realize they can't do this, and they leave.

This was the weakest link in the episode, for sure. There were a few funny moments, like when Mitchell brags to Cam and Jay that he's going to stay out dancing all night, and he starts singing a little song, and Cam points out that it's the theme song to the antique road show. Or later, when Haley comes over to pregame with Gloria and Mitchell, she brings mojitos and cosmos, "the drinks of your people." However, the plot thread didn't go anywhere. We get it, they're getting older so they can't party like they used to. So what? Where's the humor in that? Also, it sort of bothered me that Lily and Joe were invisible in this episode. Who the heck was watching the kids? Maybe Andy? It would have been nice to have at least some mention of the little ones.

Finally, you've got Phil and Claire's plot thread. Phil is having a hard time selling a house in his own neighborhood, because right across the street is a really pornographic statue. It turns out that Phil and Claire's crazy neighbors Ronnie and Amber also hate the statue. Their shared hatred brings them together, and they all decide to go out to dinner. Claire and Phil are surprised to learn that Ronnie and Amber aren't as terrible as they first appeared. They have expensive taste in wine, and have a kid who's going to Juilliard. Ronnie and Amber suggest that they go and tear up the pornographic statue with Ronnie's truck. At first, Phil and Claire say no, which makes Ronnie and Amber mad. But on the way home, Claire decides they should go for it. Phil tries to stop them, but inadvertently backs up the truck over the statue. Later, as they all sit outside drinking, a cop shows up to question them about the statue. Phil happens to know him, since he sold him a house, and the whole thing is smoothed over with nobody the wiser.

I think this was my favorite thread of the night. Ronnie and Amber are hilarious. I loved the subverted expectations here, especially with the paper bag that Ronnie brought into the restaurant. Turns out, it contained a $500 bottle of wine. Claire ended up looking low-brow when she paired it with fish. Later, Phil announces that "when it comes to wine, this woman doesn't see color. She'll drink whatever is put in front of her." There was also a funny recurring joke about names. Ronnie and Amber call a waiter at the restaurant "guy," prompting Phil and Claire to think they're being rude. Turns out, the waiter's name really is Guy. Later, when the cop comes to talk to them, Phil says "hey buddy," and Ronnie and Amber warn him that cops hate being called "buddy." But Buddy is actually the cop's name! This plot thread had a good "don't judge a book" moral in it, but we still see that Ronnie and Amber are a little more out there than Phil and Claire will ever be. I liked how Phil used his good standing in the community to deflect the cop - nobody will ever know what they did to the statue!

There was a little episode tag with Alex and Luke which I didn't even feel the need to mention... suffice it to say, it was bad. It felt like just an excuse to add an extra minute to the running time. Not a fan.

I think I'll leave it there. This wasn't one of those super memorable episodes, but I enjoyed watching it well enough!

7/10